香闺

四年过去了，原来我变了那么多。

我哼着熟悉的曲调，想了老半天才意识到歌曲叫做《笑忘书》

一边哼唱一边想刚才和朋友的对话

“我允许自己犯错，甚至不停犯错，但绝不能反复犯同一个错误”

看了歌词发现居然惊人的吻合

我把我的感触写成了一封给自己的情书，给自己祝福

看看最前的几篇日记，发现这个ＢＬＯＧ似乎有点变味了，我是如此乐观的人呀，怎么能老是伤春悲秋？！

我爱长假

实在是太需要充足的睡眠了

我要睡足７*２４小时呀！

These are those days
when I can get no sleep
I'm so tired I'd like
to fall into sleep
I fall in my bed
but still I'm awake

These questions in my
mind are so much
bigger than life
but my life is short
I have to leave
them behind
I have to try and forget
that I am still in my bed

In my deepest fears
I'm losing you
Even if somebody
tried to stop my heart
I'm still alive
I will never give up

Just turn off the lights
Don't wanna
see me die
I look like I'm dead but
when you look at me
I am still alive

Just open your eyes
Don't wanna see me cry
I'm right here where you
want me to be fighting
with myself

All I need to feel is your
breath on my skin
This endless longing
between you and me
We can't give up now,
we're gonna make it
somehow

In my sweetest dreams
I'm with you
Even if somebody
tried to stop my heart
I'm still alive
I will never give up

Just turn off the lights
Don't wanna see me die
I look like I'm dead but
when you look at me
I am still alive

Just open your eyes
Don't wanna see me cry
I'm right here where you
want me to be fighting
with myself

人生中第二次去北京，依旧怀揣着不安与逃避的心

听说有个地方叫“百花深处”，配合着歌词，回荡着香艳的韵味

北京一夜

不想再问你你到底在何方
不想再思量你能否归来么
想着你的心想着你的脸
想捧在胸口能不放就不放

one night in beijing 我留下许多情
不管你爱与不爱都是历史的尘埃
one night in beijing 我留下许多情
不敢在午夜问路怕走到了百花深处

人说百花的深处住着老情人缝着绣花鞋
面容安详的老人依旧等着那出征的归人

one night in beijing 你可别喝太多酒
不管你爱与不爱都是历史的尘埃
one night in beijing 我留下许多情
把酒高歌的男儿是北方的狼族

人说北方的狼族会在寒风起站在城门外
穿着腐锈的铁衣呼唤城门开眼中含着泪

我已等待千年为何城门还不开
我已等待了千年为何良人不回来

one night in beijing 我留下许多情
不敢在午夜问路怕触动了伤心的魂
one night in beijing 我留下许多情
不敢在午夜问路怕走到了地安门

人说地安门里面有位老妇人犹在痴痴等
面容安详的老人依旧等着那出征的归人

one night in beijing 你可别喝太多酒
走在地安门外没有人不动真情
one night in beijing 你会留下许多情
不要在午夜问路怕触动了伤心的人

以后，我可以回忆

那年夏天，我失去了她，见到了他

消散的不止一个梦

 

要知道伤心总是难免的，

在每一个梦醒时分

有些事你现在不必问

有些人你永远不必等

Desert Rose 
Why do you live alone 
If you are sad 
I'll make you leave this life
Are you white, blue or bloody red 
All I can see is drowning in cold gray sand

The winds of time 
You knock me to the ground 
I'm dying of thirst 
I wanna run away 
I don't know how to set me free to live 
My mind cries out feeling pain 

I've been roaming to find myself 
How long have I been feeling endless hurt 
Falling down, rain flows into my heart 
In the pain I'm waiting for you 
Can't go back 
No place to go back to 
Life is lost. Flowers fall 
If it's all dream 
Now wake me up 
If it's all real 
Just kill me 

I'm making the wall inside my heart 
I don't wanna let my emotions get out 
It scares me to look at the world 
Don't want to find myself lost in your eyes
I tried to drown my past in gray 
I never wanna feel more pain 
Run away from you without saying any words 
What I don't wanna lose is love 

Through my eyes 
Time goes by like tears 
My emotion's losing the color of life 
Kill my heart 
Release all my pain 
I'm shouting out loud 
Insanity takes hold over me 

Turning away from the wall 
Nothing I can see 
The scream deep inside 
reflecting another person in my heart 
He calls me from within 
"All existence you see before you
must be wipe out: 
Dream, Reality, Memories 
and Yourself." 

I begin to lose control of myself 
My lust is so blind, destroys my mind 
Nobody can stop my turning to madness 
No matter how you try to hold me in your heart 
Why do you wanna raise these walls 
I don't know the meaning of hatred 
My brain gets blown away hearing words of lies 
I only want to hold your love 

Stab the doll filled with hate 
Wash yourself with their blood 
Drive into the raging current of time 
Swing your murderous weapon into the belly
"the earth" 
Shout and start creating confusion 
Shed your blood for preasure 
And what? For love? 
What am I suppose to do? 

I believe in the madness called " Now " 
Past and future prison my heart 
Time is blind 
But I wanna trace my heart 
On the wall of time, over pain in my heart 
Art of life Art of life
Insane blade stabbing dreams 
Try to break all truth now 
But I can't heal this broken heart in pain 

Cannot start to live. Cannot end my life 
Keep on crying 

Close my eyes 
Time breath I can hear 
All love and sadness melt in my heart 

Dry my tears 
Wipe my broody face 
I wanna feel me living my life outside my wall 

You can't draw a picture of yesterday , so 
You're painting your heart with your blood 
You can't say "No" 
Only turning the wheel of time 
with a rope around your neck 
You build a wall of morality and take a breath 
from between the bricks 
You make up imaginary enemies and are chased by them
You're trying to commit suicide 
You're satisfied with your prologue 
Now you're painting your first chapter black 
You are putting the scraps of life together 
and trying to make an asylum for yourself 
You're hitting a bell at the edge of the stage 
and 
You are trying to kill me 

I believe in the madness called " Now " 
Time goes flowing, breaking my heart 
Wanna live 
Can't let my heart kill myself 
Still I haven't found what I'm looking for 
Art of life Art of life
I try to stop myself 
But my heart goes to destroy the truth 
Tell me why 
I want the meaning of my life

Do I try to live? Do I try to love 
in my dream

I am breaking the wall inside my heart 
I just wanna let my emotions get out 
Nobody can stop 
I'm running to freedom 
No matter how you try to hold me in your world 
Like a doll carried by the flow of time 
I sacrificed the present moment for the future 
I was in chains of memory half-blinded 
Losing my heart, walking in the sea of dream 

Close my eyes 
Rose breathes I can hear 
All love and sadness melt in my heart 
Dry my tears 
Wipe my bloody face 
I wanna feel me living my life 
outside my wall

Dreams can make me mad 
I can't leave my dream
I can't stop myself 
Don't know what I am
What lies are truth 
What truth are lies 

I believe in the madness called " Now " 
Time goes flowing, breaking my heart 
Wanna live 
Can't let my heart kill myself 
Still I haven't found what I'm looking for 
Art of life Art of life
I try to stop myself 
But my heart goes to destroy the truth 
Tell me why 
I want the meaning of my life 
Do I try to live? Do I try to love 

Art of life Art of life
An Eternal Bleeding heart 
You never wanna breathe your last 
Wanna live 
Can't let my heart kill myself 
Still I am feeling for 
A Rose is breathing love 
in my life 

——《Art  of  Life》 

今天开始做LOLI！